Monday, February 18, 2008

I think God is trying to tell us something ...

I have always believed that God sends us messages when we need them the most. Even though we have tried to be strong, it has been very difficult at times for myself and Erin to maintain a positive outlook, especially with seeing Aidan the way he is in the PICU. Last night and today, though, I have been given a sense of hope.

Since the accident, I have been placing a lot more faith in God than I hadin the past. I will admit that, as a Christian, I am hardly the model example of what one should be. I decided to start listening to a local Christian station here in NC, New Life 91.9FM in Charlotte. Last night on my way back from the house, I heard a particular song. I turned down the radio, as I did not want to hear it. Erin took the car later and heard the same song. Then, today, I had to get new glasses (lost them when I dove in the water to save Aidan). On the way into the parking garage of the mall by the hospital, I heard it again. At that point, I realized what was going on. I sat in the car, listened to the entire song, cried, and thanked God for what he was trying to tell me.

Below are the lyrics for the song I heard. You tell me what God is trying to say:

I'm down on my knees again tonight
I'm hoping this prayer will turn out right
See there is a boy that needs Your help
I've done all that I can do myself
His mother is tired
I'm sure You can understand
Each night as he sleeps
She goes in to hold his hand
And she tries not to cry
As the tears fill her eyes

Can You hear me?
Am I getting through tonight?
Can You see him?
Can You make him feel all right?
If You can hear me
Let me take his place somehow
See, he's not just anyone
He's my son

Sometimes late at night I watch him sleep
I dream of the boy he'd like to be
I try to be strong and see him through
But God who he needs right now is You
Let him grow old
Live life without this fear
What would I be
Living without him here
He's so tired and he's scared
Let him know that You're there


Can You hear me?
Can You see him?
Please don't leave him
He's my son

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