Sunday, September 28, 2008

Yet ANOTHER Change to the Comment Process

Last night, I made some changes to how people can leave comments because we had received complaints about not being able to see the verification image. I made it to where you didn't need that image, but we would moderate comments so we could review them before they are officially posted.
Fast forward 6 hours ... Erin gets her first comment for moderation. Erin rejected it immediately, but I think it needs to be posted for the world to see:
YOU are unbelievable. YOU don't watch your son, you just assumed some one else was watching him, YOU are totally responsible, YOU are his mother and it is YOUR job to be sure he is safe. YOU knew there was WATER at your father in laws. YOU were just excited about having a party so you could eat.
It is YOUR fault and you blame the government???? 
Paybacks a bitch.
This comment was left by an anonymous party ... the F***ING COWARD didn't even have the cajones to put his or her name to the comments!!!!!!!!!

We love receiving comments from our friends, family, and even complete strangers who have only recently heard our story. We also know some of you post anonymous comments that are positive and even put your names to them; however, the purpose of this blog is not to get bashed or placed on a guilt trip. We deal with this every day and have to live with our own questions and doubts. This is supposed to be a positive experience for us and our readers, even though we may, on occassion, vent our frustrations.

So, I am making yet another change to how you can leave comments. You are now required to have a login to leave a comment. We hate doing this, but see it this way: if you are going to leave comments like that, we want to know who you are. To rephrase a common saying: Better to post nothing and let us think you're an ass, than to post something and have your name attached to it so we can publicly label you in the blogosphere as one. 

If you have trouble registering, there is help available on this site on how to create a username.

-- Russell


Cindy said...

Ok, looks like I have a google account...
What an @ss to leave such a message on your blog. As you said you have to go through this everyday.
"walk a mile in my shoes" comes to mind.
Have a good rest of your weekend, and put those terrible people out of your mind and focus on us good people! :)

Lisa said...

This post makes me so sad. How hurtful. And how untrue. You are obviously wonderful parents, and we all need to keep in mind that this could have happened to ANY ONE OF US.

I keep up with the blog, and continue to pray for strength for your family. Aidan is doing so well!

Hugs and Prayers,

AKA 4Gifts4Lisa, cakecentral

Unknown said...

I'm so sorry to hear about that awful comment you received. Clearly, this person does not understand how Christ can redeem even the most difficult of circumstances. It has encouraged me so much over the past several months of reading your blog to see how you both trust in Him and are confident that He has a plan for you and your family. Praying for all of you!

Erin said...

I wanted to respond to the commenter immediately when I read the message this morning. I was so deeply hurt. Before this accident, I always had my boys with me. I never thought twice about taking them with me to the store or to run errands, but that was when Aidan wasn't entirely dependent on me for everything.

I don't know a single parent that is with their child 24/7 and never leaves them so that they can have a moment to themselves. Just being able to take a shower every day is a luxury around here because I DO TAKE CARE OF MY KIDS!

Having a nurse here ensures that should I have to take Evan to the doctor or go to the doctor myself, or if I have to run errands, Aidan is taken care of and he can get his medicines as scheduled. We only have a nurse for 6 hours during the day and for 6 hours at night while we sleep. I don't yet feel 100% comfortable with Aidan being unsupervised at night, and unfortunately, I have to sleep.

I'm sorry that some moron out there thinks that they should judge me the way they have, and it is apparent that they aren't parents because they are completely off base. Yes, I knew that there was a pond at my step-dad's house. I didn't do anything that day than I had ever done before. Aidan wanted to play outside. He liked to explore the tractors and stuff and the swing set is out there. My step-dad said he would watch Aidan so we could unload the car and set up things for the party.

I was blowing up balloons because Aidan LOVED balloons and Russell was setting up the inflatable bounce and slide that we had gotten Aidan for his birthday. I wasn't so concerned with having a party so I could EAT! I wanted Aidan to be around family and friends and celebrate his birthday. Aidan was being supervised but he wandered off... it happens. Children wander off- all it takes is to turn your back for a moment and they are off. My step-dad and my grandpa thought that Aidan came around to the front of the house where Russell and I were at when they didn't see him. It was just a terrible accident.

I can't even begin to explain all the circumstances that lead to this accident. At some point any one of us should have seen Aidan going down the hill to the pond, but for whatever reason we didn't. He was a sneaky little boy. He found a way down there without being noticed or passing our line of sight as we were all in and out of the house during the 30 minutes that it took for this accident to happen.

I'm tired of being judged. If you think that I don't beat myself up everyday for what happened to my son, you truly are an idiot. I can't go back and change things though, as much as I wish I could.

I'm done. I can't erase all the stupid people out of the world. But I'm tired of thinking about this. I've let it bother me all day when I shouldn't.

Unknown said...

Don't let the words of one ignorant jerk get to you. No one who has children can say that they never, ever let them out of their sight - and if they do say that, they are lying. Whoever that 'anonymous' person was, needs a good reality check and a lesson in compassion.

God bless you all. Your strength through this journey has been inspiring.

((((((((((hugs to your family from mine)))))))))))

SugarEd Productions said...

I know that had to hurt; you are human. But please know that person is just an a$$ with nothing better to do than judge others. IT was not your fault. Period.

Kathy from Phoenix said...

Hi friend,
The bottom line with that type of person is that they have no compassion for others. Hey person, do you even have any friends?????
I myself have had heart stopping moments with my children and my grandchildren, the only difference is that mine turned out a different from yours. You hang in there and don't let the words of one take away the blesssings of your friends and family out her. We do pray for you and we do care for you, that is compassion, to care about someone you have never met but just want to encourage a brother or sister.
Kathy from Phoenix

Melissa Dovel said...

Hello to Aidans mommy and daddy,

I have found your blog and have tried the past few days to leave you a message so ill try again. The short of what I wanted to communicate is that people like that leave comments just to hurt you and so that you will counter back. I know its happend to me:( I know its important to vent and I would if I were you as well. The truth is all of us have let our children out of our line of sight and most times nothing happens and few it does. I will say that my 5yo. managed to sneak out of the house early one morning (we have a man made pond 50yards from our back deck and a neighborhood swimming pool 100yards in front of our house) AND my 5yo. cant swim w/o floaties. She went OUT THE FRONT DOOR while I layed on the couch facing the door and peacefully asleep. So there you go to the ass who attack your blog I AM A WAY WORSE PARENT! Praise God my daughter was ok and just scared us all. Point being your obviously great parents and you had this horrible thing happen to you. I want you to know far more good people praying for you out here than jerks trying to pull you down. Both of your children are beautifull! I would encourage you to read our familys blog of a simmilar situation on my blog roll under Sydney Alvey. Shes doing awesome and for so long it did not look like she would. Never give up and the good ones will lift you up in prayer.

The Dovels

Anonymous said...

Hey Erin,
Did you see Oprah yesterday? I hope you watched. I tivoed it and I'm up late watching it now. It's about moms who are overwhelmed with all the responsibilities and a lady is on that left her baby in the car when she went to work. Others have called into the show and are telling the close calls they have had with their children. We are all human and no one can watch their children at all times.

Unknown said...

I will pray for Aiden as well as the entire family. You have a great site with meaningful scripture and song that move people. Stay stong in your walk and don't destroy your witness with the response you gave to the anonymous poster. God Bless!

Peg said...

I am so sorry someone felt the need to be so cruel and mean.

My love and prayers are with you all.

Cindy said...

Ok, time for another update! :)
I miss you!

Unknown said...

the comment you recieved was un called for.
it was an accident. and just that an accident.
i keep remembering thumper from Bambi , " if you cant say something nice then dont say anything at all."

hugs and prayers